I love reading Scott Noelle’s The Daily Groove.  I find it interesting to read this today on the same day I was reading posts in the TCC forum about tantrums.  In particular, the words “In nature-based, pleasure-oriented, partnership cultures, such protests are rarely triggered” really struck a chord with me.   Nature-based, pleasure-oriented, partnership cultures.  It sounds so nice?  I love nature, I prefer to do things for pleasure, and I believe in helping others.  I think this is a great attitude to adopt and I want to try this with my son.  I think I always wanted this, but never had it spelled out in these words for me.

Below is the passage from which I extracted the above quote:

:: Terrible Two’s & Rebellious Teens… NOT! ::

  (Continued from yesterday — full text at
   http://dailygroove.net/terrible-not )

Developmentally, toddlers and Teens have one thing
in common: they’re on the verge of a quantum leap in
personal autonomy. They’re on a mission to become
*themselves* — to get in touch with their Inner Power
more than ever before.

Anytime they feel imposed upon or coerced, that
mission is blocked, and they instinctively protest.
In nature-based, pleasure-oriented, partnership
cultures, such protests are rarely triggered, so
terrible two’s and teen rebellions rarely occur.

But in our anti-nature, control-oriented culture,
parents are expected (if not required *by law*) to
oppose or control children’s natural developmental
impulses toward personal empowerment, which
guarantees the terribles!

The shift from terrible to terrific begins with your
commitment to creative partnership. Then, whenever
your child exhibits “terrible” behavior, you can
re-interpret it as evidence of his or her unfolding
autonomy, and ask yourself this:

    “How can I use my creativity
    to support my child’s growth
    in a way that works for ALL of us?”


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